Marcus Cole's awakening
by chibi-eladiel
Summary: 2269: On Minbar, Marcus Cole is awakening after 8 years in cryogenics. How will he bear his new life ? (corrected version until chap. 6)
1. Chapter 1: the awakening

_This is not my first B5 fic, but my first English one, I translated it myself from French, so please be indulgent and I hope it'll please you…_

_Special thanks to **Evil Shall Giggle**, my beta reader, who took much of her time to correct this chapter (and the others). Thousand thanks to her_

_Chapter 1: the awakening_

_Minbar, Tuzanor, training centre of the Rangers, 2269 _

Turval, the old Master of martial arts, was leading a group of people in the wet undergrounds which made the basement of the Rangers' centre. He said to them to wait, and entered in a brightly lit room. In the middle of this room, an open cryogenic unit, and a man of about thirty years lay on a medical bed. He was human, rather tall, and bearded, with black hair. A glass screen surrounded the bed, isolating it from the rest of the room's space. Only the noise of the instruments controlling the cardiac pulsations and the breathing of the patient were the only sounds to be heard...

Turval spoke to the Minbari doctor who was in charge of the patient:

"How is his condition?" he asked.

"He will awake soon," the doctor replied, "this new technique has functioned well and restored his vital force…"

The doctor went out and spoke with some of the group of people who had followed Turval. A child slipped out of the small crowd and went to place himself in front of the glass which isolated the bed. Turval rested a hand on his shoulder, and said to him, "Look at him, child."

The child raised his green eyes on the old Master, and smiled. At this point in time the man on the bed moved, then opened his eyes. The child smiled widely and said **"**Hello, Marcus**."**

Turval left the room to call the rest of the group, and they entered. John Sheridan, one of them, exclaimed, "David! Why did you leave alone?"

The boy did not answer, but threw a glance on his mother, who was on his other side. She posed a hand on his shoulder and smiled to him. The man called Marcus tried to rise on an elbow, but fell down. The doctor scanned him, and said, "His constants are up, but he needs rest, you can enter and see him."

The tight door opened on the glass, and the child entered first, followed by his parents.

"Where am I?" Marcus stammered, "Susan…?"

Delenn smiled, "She survived, extremely fortunately, but we found you just in time and put you in cryogenics... You are on Minbar now."

Marcus gave a weak smile, and asked, "We won?"

Sheridan answered at his turn, "Yes, we won."

Marcus' eyes darkened, seeming to remember something

"I deserve worse than death," he murmured, "I gave you up in the middle of the combat…"

"You did it for her," Sheridan replied, carefully choosing his words, "I would have done the same thing in your place."

He glanced over at Delenn, catching her eye with a small smile. Turning back to Marcus, he said, "But we will see to that later."

Marcus spoke again, seeing and speaking to David, "I do not have the honour to know you..."

The child smiled and said proudly, "I am David Sheridan, I am six years old."

Marcus' eyes widened, "Six years? How long did I stay in cryogenics?"

Delenn and Sheridan looked at each other uneasily. Delenn spoke first, "In fact... eight years..."

Marcus sat up and exclaimed, "Eight years? All this time?"

Delenn tried to calm him down by speaking kindly, "It was necessary to find the means of returning your vital force to you, and they only found it very recently..." she smiled slightly, "But you are alive, that is all that counts... We will explain everything to you in time."

Marcus agreed. He was completely lost, and put back his head on his pillow with a sigh. Delenn, Sheridan, David and Turval left. Once in the corridor, Delenn said, "We had to expect that, he is lost... the world changed much around him."

Turval agreed, and the small voice of David piped up, "Then it is him, Marcus, the man you told me about so often? I imagined him taller…"

Sheridan tenderly ruffled his son's hair, and smiled at him. "Yes, my son, it is Marcus... I believe you will get along well with him."

The boy did not say anything, but remained lost in his thoughts.

In the following days, Marcus recovered slowly. Delenn, who visited him two days later, found him sitting up, his back supported by two pillows. He smiled to her and greeted her as the protocol indicated: "My regards, _Entil Z' ha_."

Delenn sat down beside the bed, and asked kindly, "Do you feel better?"

Marcus nodded. "Much better, thank you." He paused, and then continued, "Much better than I ever was, I believe. But I do not understand anything any more…"

Delenn remarked the sadness in his eyes. "It is normal," she replied gently, "You have just spent eight years in a bubble. Many things changed, but not our feelings towards you. You remain our friend."

Marcus smiled lightly and bowed as best he could, "Thank you, I'm glad to hear that. Then our fleet finally won...?"

Delenn had a chill, and chose her words carefully. "Yes... just after, Doctor Hobbes found you close to Susan, you were clinically dead but your brain still lived, which made it possible to put to you in cryogenics and to bring you back here, to Minbar. Susan was alive and almost cured..."

Marcus lowered his eyes, and asked, his voice veiled, "Where is she now?"

Delenn knew he wanted the truth, and told it to him, "She is the captain of the EAS _Titans_, and many are speaking about her as the next chief of the Forces."

Marcus stayed silent a moment, and finally commented, "She made her way, that does not astonish me; she has the shoulders to bear all that..." he paused again, then asked, "And Earth Alliance?"

The moment had come to tell him about the eight years he spent in cryogenics, and she began, but not until she'd taken a deep breath. "There is no more Earth Alliance, it did not survive the war. John has been president of the Interstellar Alliance since the beginning of 2262. It includes the old non-aligned worlds. Rangers are its armed force, they await only you. You will be able to retake your place there, and your experiment will be irreplaceable."

Marcus smiled sadly. "I fear I could not understand anything now."

Delenn insisted, "Nothing changed there, just the _White Stars_, which were somewhat improved. But I let you choose your destiny now, although you have to know that your place is awaiting you still."

Marcus then asked, "The child I saw last time... is he your son?"

Delenn smiled almost shyly, and Marcus couldn't help but smile as well at the familiar expression "Yes. We married, John and me, just after the end of the war and the creation of the Alliance, and David was born in 2263."

A momentary light appeared in Marcus' dark eyes. "He is adorable," he said.

This time, Delenn laughed. "Do not believe that, he has a strong temper, and he already wants to be a Ranger, at his age!"

As Marcus grinned, Delenn rose gracefully. "You should rest now," she told him, "the doctor said that you could leave briefly tomorrow. We have, for the moment, kept secret the news of your awakening, but, now that we are reassured of your fate, we will see to your destiny."

Marcus remained alone after Delenn's exit. Susan... she was alive, in good health... all he had made, it was for her. At the time, he had been preserving a hope to conquest her heart, but now, eight years later?

Confused in his head and his heart, he decided to sleep a little to recover more quickly…

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	2. Chapter 2:finding his place in the world

_The second chapter, corrected by my precious beta reader **Evil Shall Giggle**. May she be thanked for her patience…_

_Chap. 2: Finding his place in the world_

The following day, Marcus managed to stand up. In spite of the contrary opinion of the doctor, who did not want him to go outside but walk in the infirmary, he made a point of leaving for the gardens. One of the Rangers guarding him accompanied him. Nothing had really changed there in eight years...

He walked for a while, breathing the fresh air and listening to the noises, which, despite everything, had remained familiar. He was drawn from his daydream by... David, who ran into him. He knelt and raised the child before asking, "Are you hurt? It's not a good idea to run so quickly!"

The child passed a hand through his curled nut brown hair, and said with a rueful smile, "I am sorry, I did not look in front of me... I was bored, all alone..."

Marcus said, "Then walk with me."

The child agreed, and confided, "I do not like to be all alone. Here I do not have anybody with whom to play, and my parents did not want to leave me in Yedor... Come, I will show you something!"

With Marcus following, and David took him to a bush where a nest of _Temshwee _was hidden. The baby birds were chirping merrily, and David observed them while saying to Marcus, "They are nice, aren't they? I discovered them yesterday."

The child's refreshing curiosity made Marcus smile. "You know," he said, leaning forward as if confiding a secret, "I walked in this garden every evening when I was in training, in order to better apprehend the perfection of nature."

Giving Marcus the smile he had inherited from his father, David replied, "I am learning it myself... I am normally in a monastery of Yedor, but they gave me a leave."

"David!" A call broke the short silence, "Where are you?"

It was Delenn, who was searching for her son. She smiled upon seeing him with Marcus, "Excuse him…"

Marcus bowed and answered, "No, he did not disturb me, on the contrary..." He smiled.

Delenn put her hand on her son's shoulder, "He must go to finish his homework, his tutors are looking for him."

The child looked at his mother and asked, "Mother, may I remain with him? Please?"

Like all Minbari children, he addressed his mother respectfully in public. He smiled to her, that smile which so much resembled his father's, and Delenn did not have the heart to refuse him.

"Fine," she agreed, "but do not exhaust Marcus, and don't be too late coming home."

The child bowed as a sign of acceptance, and Delenn went out again to continue her work. Marcus, accompanied by David, continued his walk. He was feeling well, alive, and breathed with lungs full of the scents of rare flowers. But he did not yet have all his strength, and he ended up returning to the infirmary after having accompanied David back to his parents.

The doctor examined him, and found him in good form in spite of the long walk he had taken. Marcus would have his forces back in little time, and it was decided to move him inside the training centre—in new quarters, but still under medical supervision. Meanwhile, the news of his awakening was announced to all Rangers. Marcus was known by some of the older members of the order, and his reputation quickly circulated the centre. He wanted to exercise, but his doctor disapproved, and he had to be satisfied to take his new _denn' bok_ in hand without anything to do with it. Delenn had given orders to old Rangers, those who knew about his defection could not speak about it, not at any price.

However, although Marcus seemed to be normal again, Sheridan perceived a crack. One did not have to be a genius to know the cause of this crack, it was Ivanova, of course. At the time, Marcus had done much to hide his feelings, although it was obvious that he had a certain attraction for Ivanova. The fact that he had given his life so that she survived proved the depth of his feelings towards her.

One evening, when Sheridan was walking in the gardens, holding Delenn by the hand, he said to her, "What should we do? Marcus gave up his place in the combat without an order. Normally it is liable to military tribunal, but…"

Delenn stayed silent a moment and replied, "I remember perfectly, but I will plead for him. Susan was dying; it remained to her one week to live at maximum." She lowered her gaze, "I know what it is to lose a loved one, you know, I tasted it when you died in Z' Hadum... I never told you, but, if you had not returned, I would have starved myself to death, so our souls would have met forever. Ask Stephen, he knows; he had to persuade me to discontinue my fast." She gave him a small smile, "I understand perfectly Marcus' actions."

Astonished and saddened, Sheridan remained silent for a moment and finished by saying to his wife, "It's not the same thing... "

But Delenn never declared herself defeated, and continued her argument. "It is, and you know it. Marcus acted out of love, he gave his life to save her. There is no proof of love more beautiful."

Sheridan stopped and kissed her on her forehead, and she saw how much he was troubled. "I never knew that you had done that," he told her, "give me time to assimilate it." He paused, and then continued, "But I must say that we will have to make a decision about Marcus, sooner or later."

Silence settled between them, and Delenn began again, "Finally, what will we decide? And will we decide ourselves?"

Sheridan remained silent a long moment before saying, "We must still think about it... Marcus has extenuating circumstances, and his remarkable states of service plead for him, he has more than one time saved the situation. That should incline to leniency. Moreover, he could be an excellent professor here and his experiment is irreplaceable... But there remains another problem: what will we do when Susan arrives?"

Ivanova was coming to Minbar a few weeks later in order to see her godson and to attend his diploma ceremony, she had taken two weeks of vacation for that, time for her vessel to undergo one complete refit in spatiodocks. Sheridan knew very well that Susan had never recovered from Marcus' death, and finding him alive could cause her too great a shock... What to do about that?

_Sector 58, on board the EAS Titans (Warlock Class)_

Captain Susan Ivanova sat in her armchair with a morose air. This surveillance mission in sector 58 was truly tedious. "I leave you the bridge," she said to her second, rising, "If you need me, I'll be in my ready room."

Why remain here? The scans had not given anything for two hours. Susan entered her ready room. It was a vast, clear room, with bay windows opening largely onto space. It was the place where she worked, and a settee even enabled her to sleep there, just in case. In fact, she had never forgotten the day when EarthDome wanted her to pay rent on her quarters many years ago, and, based on her experiences with the brass, she preferred to be on the safe side. After all, they didn't like the Titans and all she represented. Near the settee andopposite to the door leading to the bridge was her desk, large and practical.

She sat down in her armchair and picked up the first memo pad she came across. Only a few things were placed on her desk, one of which was a photograph of her godson, David Sheridan, with his parents. Ivanova was not sentimental, but, on the wall behind her was hung one of her more invaluable memories, Marcus' _Denn'bok_ with an inscription. Each time she looked at it, her heart tightened and tears filled her eyes without her being able to restrain them.

She threw the pad on the ground, and cussed between her teeth. Why did she have to be so irritable these days? Perhaps it was frustration at being confined by missions without much interest while her ship, based on the technology of the Shadows, was one of most powerful forces of the Alliance...

She thought that the current Earth leaders were fearing her, fearing the force of destruction that Warlock class ships represented. It had been eight years since Susan had taken command of one of them, and she had learned to trust her ship.

Resting her eyes on the portrait of her godson, Susan smiled. David was the only person who was able, since Marcus' death, to inspire her to some emotion and feeling, she liked him very much. On the weekend, when the _Titans_ would return to the spatiodocks, she would leave for Minbar in order to attend David's school ceremony, as she had promised. Delenn said that he was likely to do well, and perhaps be head of his class. David was an smart kid, she knew it, he would turn out well. He was already using his natural charm, his eternal smile and his critical mind to have his way.

Ivanova returned her focus to her work as captain: paperwork, always paperwork. It was the part she hated most. At the end of the hour, she had had enough, pulled on her uniform and returned to the bridge. Her second in command made her a sign that there was still nothing.

Suddenly, a very well known signal appeared on the screen. "A _White Star_," the person in charge of operations informed her, "they're hailing us."

Susan just nodded, and a Minbari Ranger appeared on the screen. "Captain Susan Ivanova, of the EAS _Titans_," she greeted him in Minbari, under the eyes of his astonished crew.

"This is _White Star_ 19," he returned, "Greetings, captain Ivanova."

Obviously he had recognized her. She began again, "Do you need assistance?"

The Ranger stayed unflinching, "Not at all, but we wanted to inform you that there is a space anomaly in the sector. Beware of unusual gravimetric forces."

Respectfully, Susan replied, "Thank you. May Valen guide your road."

The Minbari acknowledged her farewell, gave her one of his own, and the _White Star_ departed.

The crew around Susan Ivanova did not say a word. Some knew that before obtaining her command, Susan had been the right hand of John Sheridan on Babylon 5 at the time of the secession, and that she had consequently commanded the Rangers. By the force of events, and in the desire to better understand her subordinates, she had learned a little Minbari, as well as the manners to adopt with them. She also knew by heart the systems used on board of the _White Star _ships.

"We didn't see anything," her second in command told her, "even with our more than improved scanners."

"The _White Star_s have another system,"Susan explained to him, "they can react organically to any anomaly comprising something organic. It's undoubtedly how they detected it." Although she could have said more, she did not particularly want to speak about it further. All that had been pointed out indicated a heap of unpleasant things for her…

_Minbar, a few days later... _

Marcus was sitting in the room of meditation, but he did not manage to find the state necessary to achieve the place's purpose. Sighing, he left for the gardens. He had not been reinstated to active service yet, and he was bored. To kill time, he had consulted the files on the eight last years' events, from the formation of Alliance to now. All had changed, and he was not sure he could understand anything. The Interstellar Alliance, his creation, the Centauri war... all that had enamelled the year 2262 was a thousand miles off what he had been able to imagine. Since then, the Alliance had known many years of relative peace, and so little David had not lived in a universe in flames, such as Marcus himself had known. But Marcus was asking himself many questions: what would happen to him now?

Delenn and Sheridan did not seem to want to put him in front of a Ranger court, whereas he deserved it, and, if they decided one day to do it, he would plead guilty, not having any intention to withdraw the consequences of his acts. He raised himself and looked at the sun lying down above the training centre. The rays were reflected on the crystals, forming a splendid spectacle. But Marcus was not in the mood to observe this perfection. Sighing with a tired air, he returned in his quarters. It was there that the doctors charged to examine him found him. They looked him over and said, "Your forces are entirely returned, you will be able to begin active service."

Marcus agreed, smiled, but did not say anything.

For a certain time, Delenn had noticed what she had classified to her husband as 'inner distress'. Both knew well that it was true, Marcus felt guilty. And the arrival of Susan would not help anything, on the contrary... it would only serve to complicate things.

How could they manage the situation?

The one who found the solution was involuntarily David. He was bored, and his parents had more and more difficulty to keep him indoors, studying. He passed much time with Marcus, who appreciated his company. David spoke once about his godmother, Susan Ivanova, who he liked very much, but, when he caught sight of the expression that Marcus wore, he did not speak about her again. His child's intuition dictated to him that there was something there which exceeded him completely.

Delenn came one day to visit Marcus in his quarters. She trusted her instinct to try to defuse the situation. Marcus greeted her politely, and asked her, "What makes me worthy of the honour of this visit?"

Delenn remained silent for a moment, and answered, "John and I are concerned for you."

Marcus' dark eyes rested on her as he replied, "There's no problem, I assure you."

Delenn, diplomat that she was, decided to dismiss the response as one of his usual brushing offs. She began again.

"Marcus, I know that you are not well... I suspected your feelings towards Susan, although you were very discrete, and your actions confirmed my intuition."

"I gave her all that I could, I couldn't bear the idea that she might die." Marcus took his head in his hands, then raised his eyes and continued, "I abandoned you all in the middle of the decisive battle, I did not have the right to do that. At the time, when I made this decision, I knew that I was betraying the ideal of Rangers and my oath, but I did not think I would survive and I also thought that my death would perhaps atone for my actions. But I survived, and I do not know what to do anymore. This time is not mine anymore, and your leniency confuses me." He sighed, looking down again, "I do not know if I could bear to find myself in front of Susan, I believe that I would die..."

It was one of the longest speeches which Delenn had ever heard Marcus utter. He was a man not very inclined to words, but he was cracking—he had too many things in him. He was a victim of general trouble.

Delenn began again, "I understand that, Marcus, but I do not see why I should judge you as though you were a common criminal, you who saved us from desperate situations many times. You have the choice, the future is open to you now, you just have to decide what you will do with it. You remain a Ranger, never will I take that from you. Your experience will be invaluable to the young recruits."

"I do not deserve your leniency," Marcus said, moved, "but the idea of transmitting my knowledge does not displease me. It will remain to me a reason to live."

Delenn left then. John awaited her at the exit, and she said to him while walking, "He will recover, I think. It is necessary for him to think a little on his own, but we will bring also our assistance to him. Has Susan said when she will arrive?"

Sheridan nodded, "Yes, in two days... We will manage. If he remains in Tuzanor it will be no problem, I think."

But Delenn was trained to consider all possibilities, and inquired, "And if Susan wants to visit the centre of the Rangers?"

"Then we well see to that when the case is presented to us," John replied to his wife. "Marcus needs to be alone, to find himself and rebuild his life."

Delenn agreed. Hopefully, all would go well. It just absolutely had to be seen to that Susan and Marcus would not find themselves in front of one another. If that happened, both would be shocked and perhaps more. Later, another month perhaps... but Delenn knew that in Susan's heart, this wound never had and never would mend. Marcus' destiny was in his hands...

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	3. Chapter 3: things evolving

_Here's chapter 3, corrected version by my precious beta reader **Evil Shall Giggle**, may she be thanked thousand times for taking much of her time correcting my awful English…_

_Chapter 3: Things evolving_

_Tuzanor, 2269_

_The black, then the intense, dazzling light... and, at the other end, his brother William awaiting him._

_"It is not yet time for you to join me, big brother, you still have a mission to fulfil..."_

_He extends a hand, but his brother is diverted from him and dissolves into the light..._

_"William!"_

Marcus was woken by his own voice, and he sat bolt upright on his bed, covered in sweat. Since his awakening from cryogenics, this nightmare returned in a recurring way, without him being able to do anything about it.

He got dressed, and approached the window. All the camp still slept, but the dawn glowed already behind the hills, colouring very slightly the crystal roofs of the thousand-year-old city.

He had liked this city since he'd arrived here, but, now, it seemed to him to have become someone different, as if he had really died and then reincarnated himself in another body. However, when he was looked in his mirror, it _was_ him he saw there, but without the interior flame he'd had before. That flame died the day of 2261 when he had given his vital force to the woman he loved, that whose life was essential to him more than his. Now, he wandered in this city he did not know any more, in the middle of people who had changed, and the hollowness filled him entirely. The only person who inspired some positive feeling to him was the little David Sheridan. The curiosity of this child, and his early wisdom moved him.

Of course, he kept his oath of fidelity to Delenn and John Sheridan, but it seemed to him that this oath had lost its value, that he had sullied it irremediably. Their kindness towards him confused him, and though he knew he did not deserve it, what he had done was liable to the worst sanctions and he knew it, as he had known that day. His life should have been the price for his fault, but death had not wanted him.

For some time, he taught his knowledge to the young recruits, as Delenn had wished, and though the work made him feel useful, his heart was not in it. How could he teach the values of Rangers if he himself had transgressed them? However, Delenn and Sheridan always relied on him, they told it to him and showed it by their acts.

How does one survive, knowing that one betrayed all that one believed in? Marcus was struggling to learn this lesson, and did his work the best that he could, while bringing his irreplaceable experience to the young recruits.

It was what Delenn, his _Entil Z' ha_, wanted from him, and he was carrying out the mission that she had entrusted to him with the seriousness that she had always shown to him.

_Yedor, presidential residence_

David, holding his diploma of first of his class, ran in the arms of his godmother. Ivanova caught him ably. "You worked well," she said, "I am proud of you."

The child smiled, that smile that he had inherited his father, and Delenn, who observed the scene, could not be prevented from smiling too. David adored his godmother, who reciprocated that to him—though she denied it vigorously. Delenn felt, however, that behind the smiling and pleasing appearance of Ivanova, that she was not happy, even though she had the assignment of captain she had always wanted. Delenn, who knew her well, felt the dark spot that corroded Susan's heart.

Ivanova turned to her and said in a light tone that sounded false to Delenn's ears, "I am afraid that this little one inherited at the same time your capacities and his father's. The intellectuals of your caste have serious competition!"

David looked at his godmother and answered peremptorily, hands on his hips, "I don't care about inlet... intel... intellectuals... I want to be _Entil Z' ha_, like dad and mom!"

"We'll see about that in a few years," Ivanova said, laughing, "perhaps will you be the second Sheridan to become _Entil Z' ha_, but you have to start at the beginning."

Delenn looked at her son. "David," she said to him gently in Minbari, "it is time for you to study now."

The child, called to order by the use of his mother's language, gave the traditional farewell impeccably and joined his tutor, who was awaiting him.

"He really is surprising," Ivanova commented to Delenn, "I didn't know that he was already understanding your language so well."

Delenn shook her head. "He's learning very quickly, and I find it important that he speak our language, it will be useful for him." She indicated a table, on which was a teapot and two cups, and both women sat.

"Things seem to be going well in this part of the galaxy," Ivanova observed.

Delenn nodded, "Yes, even if it is not easy everyday."

"Since I took command of the _Titans_," said Ivanova, "I believe that I have seen three times more galactic singularities than I did in the fifteen years of my career before. They're sending us only in reconnaissance missions without much interest, they're afraid of what the ship could do with its Shadow technology... they're afraid of me, too, I would say, as much as my ship."

"It takes time for mentalities to change," Delenn said calmly, "you know it as well as I do."

Ivanova continued:

"It's true that formerly, I fought against my own planet, but I had good reasons to do it, and what occurred after proved that I was right. Why still be wary of me? How can I explain to them that I am not dangerous, that I will not suddenly turn over my jacket without thinking and attack them with my alien ship?" All the frustration Susan had felt for years arose, and she knew that Delenn, who would be far from judging her, would only listen to her patiently. She lowered her voice and continued. "I often think that I am not in my place in this world anymore, that I should not have survived the last battle.

"How can I live with having the energy of someone that gave his life for me inside my body? I always see his face posed close to mine when I awoke in the infirmary, his closed eyes that'll never open again... the vision haunts me, it never has and never will leave me."

Delenn felt all of Susan's distress, the distress that she had never let anyone perceive, walled behind her carapace of silence and dignity. She was not far from seeing a sign there, but said only, "The Universe always puts us in our true place. If you survived, it was because your time had not yet come."

"Yep," Susan quipped, "it's easy to blame the Universe." Despite that cheeky humour which had always characterized her, she felt relieved to have been able to express all that pressed on her, and she was already feeling better.

A little later, Delenn was brushing her hair, sitting in front of her mirror, thinking about what Ivanova had said to her. She hardly heard John enter, and reacted only to the sound of his voice when he said to her, "You're looking quite pensive, Delenn."

She halted her brush. "I am worried for Susan," she said, turning to him, "she is not doing well. I spoke with her this afternoon, and it would seem that she is not happy with her assignment, and Marcus' death continues to haunt her." She sighed. "I do not, however, think that she is ready to hear that he is alive."

Sheridan sat down on their bed. "I don't understand," he said, "you say that Marcus' death still haunts her, and also that she is not ready to hear that he is alive. That seems a bit contradictory to me, you don't think so? "

Delenn sat down close to him and said slowly, "I think that that would only worsen her discomfort. It is not only the death of Marcus that haunts her, but also the feelings he had for her. It is necessary to give her time to see more clearly, to think about it, and then we will see." She did not say to her husband that she thought Marcus' feelings were reciprocated without Ivanova being truly aware of it; it was only simple intuition and not worth voicing at the moment.

"I went to Tuzanor today," John said, changing the subject, "I saw the Ranger Masters. They're charmed to have Marcus with them, he's an excellent instructor and they are all very laudatory of him. However, he always seems absent, as if disincarnated, like a part of him had really died in 2261."

"We will be present when he needs us," Delenn replied steadily, raising blue-green eyes to her husband's, "but he must cure himself."

_Tuzanor_

Marcus dodged the blow that the recruit in front of him made and disarmed him easily. A familiar noise from behind him attracted his attention and he turned around, finding himself face to face with Durhan, the _F'Hursna sech_. He greeted him, as he had to. The old Master taught only rarely these days, but he was much respected by everyone. He knew Marcus well, formerly, he had trained him personally, and found that, in spite of his stay in cryogenics, he had made progress in the handling of the _denn' bok_. However, he could not help but sense the interior distress of the Ranger, although Marcus worked hard to hide it by submerging himself in his task. Marcus broke off the training duel.

"_Sech_ Durhan," he bowed, "How may I be of service? "

Durhan smiled to his former pupil and answered while the recruits were leaving, "Nothing precise, I was only passing through, but I could see how much you've progressed, Marcus."

Marcus bowed, as he had to. "Thank you."

"I plan to retire to one of our oratories in the mountains for three days," Durhan told him, "would you like to accompany me there? That, I think, would be profitable to you."

Marcus knew very well why the Ranger Master had asked that of him, but could not what answer immediately. Were his feelings so visible?

He bowed and replied, "I will be happy to accompany you, Sech Durhan."

After all, this retirement of meditation would, without doubt, be good for him, to see more clearly into his troubles. He knew he had to trade living in the past for looking in front of him, towards his future. The old Minbari left and Marcus remained alone in the twilight filtering through the stained glasses of the windows. With a flick of his wrist, he folded his _denn' bok _and looked with interest at the play of light on the ground, trying to find the curiosity which had made him into one of best Rangers of his time, but he realized with a sigh that that also had disappeared.

With a slow step, he returned to his quarters. Even if his possessions had been returned to him, except for his old _denn' bok_, which remained in Susan's possession, he did not manage any more to feel at home in the training centre that he knew by heart.

He took one of the books that decorated the rack above his bed, '_The meditations'_, of the Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius.

It was precious to him particularly because Jeffrey Sinclair had given it to him, before he brought Babylon 4 into the past. That man had been his _Entil Z' ha_, and also his friend; he would always miss him.

He sat down on his bed and caught his head between his hands, feeling intense sadness and distress. How could he live in this world in which he did not feel at home? Each day, this impression became sharper, more present in his heart, until he could not face it anymore. It was necessary for him now to answer these questions: could he remain among the Rangers? How could he face his past mistakes? Where could he find peace in his heart? And now, overtaken by sadness, he began to cry.

_Yedor_

Susan Ivanova, with an absent air, observed the variegated crowd that pressed itself in the streets of the capital of Minbar. She, too, had not managed to find peace in her heart.

Behind her, perched on a chair too big for him, David did his holiday homework, chewing his tongue in concentration. His small voice stopped her thoughts when he asked, "Aunt Susan, can you tell me how much 3045 divided by 4 is?"

Surprised by the question, Susan thought and answered, "761, I believe."

David, glad, checked the accuracy of the calculation and smiled to his godmother with a radiant air, which made Susan smile a little herself. What a wonder this child was! He did not cease surprising her.

For some time, her instincts of her latent telepathy had troubled her, but she was still unaware of the real reason of it.

_Oratory of Tchon' kan mountains_

Marcus, his breath equal and his body relaxed, finally managed to have a normal meditation. Sitting close to Durhan, he was experiencing the first true moment of harmony with the universe since his exit of cryogenics. This retreat had been beneficial for him, as he had gradually found peace in his heart again, and his confidence in himself had returned. He could not run from himself in this place, and finally, he had more or less managed to see his troubles clearly. Remaining among Rangers was appearing to him as a good option, after all, they were the only family that remained to him.

He had to managed to live with the weight of his faults, accept them for what they were and in doing so, he had finally left the dark tunnel where he had been wandering for months. All this trouble was in the past, the future was more important from now on.

Leaving Durhan still in his meditation, he left the small oratory, and deeply breathed the evening air filled with the scents of the mountain. The old Master had been right to bring him here; he felt himself truly better, his heart lighter, and he had the feeling that he had finally found the cure to his depression. A light smile floated on his thinned-down face as he looked at Yedor shining below him.

_Yedor, the following night_

A long cry shattered the silence of the presidential residence. Ivanova, covered in sweat, awoke with a start and took a moment to remember where she was. Someone knocked at her door, and she recognized Delenn's voice. "Susan? Are you well?"

Susan, still in shock from what she had seen in her dream, could answer nothing, and Delenn entered. She saw Susan sitting in her bed with a completely absent look and she sat down close to her, as she had often done with David. Ivanova then seemed to return to reality, and turned her tear streaked face towards Delenn. "I saw him, Delenn," she wept, "I saw Marcus alive, I felt his presence here, not far...!"

Delenn knew that Susan was a latent telepath, but she did not think that she could thus discover Marcus' presence. Perhaps her capacities were growing...

For the moment, it was a question of temporising.

"You had a bad dream, Susan," she said in a comforting tone, "try to sleep again."

Susan's eyes cleared somewhat and, after a moment's pause, she said to Delenn, "You're right, just a nightmare... forgive me for having woken you."

Once Susan was horizontal again, Delenn returned to her room, pensive. John, having awakened as well, awaited her, sitting in his favourite armchair. Delenn sat down close to him. "Susan felt Marcus' presence," she informed him quietly, "it is problematic."

Sheridan shook his head "That had to happen eventually," he said, "what will we do?"

Delenn remained quiet for a moment, then said, "I do not know any more than you do, but it will be necessary to act more quickly than we envisaged."

John agreed. "I would be of the opinion to tell Susan the truth as soon as possible. We can't leave her like that."

"If you do that," Delenn replied, "you will cause a great shock to her. She would have to be prepared."

Sheridan appeared to be lost in his thoughts, then, at the end of a rather long moment, he came out of it. "It's one of the first times that I don't have an idea to solve a problem," he confessed, "but I refuse to leave my friend in such a difficult situation. It's as if I let somebody drown while I had all the cards in hand to save them, and I hate that!"

Delenn tenderly set her hand on his shoulder. "The case is not the same," she said softly, "but let it cease to worry you... you should trust the universe to put on your feet on the road to the good solution."

Being human, Sheridan had some trouble to understand her words, but he deeply respected the beliefs of his wife and did not question her.

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	4. Chapter 4: Kidnapped !

_Thousands thanks to my precious beta reader, **Evil Shall Giggle**, who is doing a fine work correct my awful English _

_Chapter 4 : Kidnapped !_

_Tuzanor, a few weeks later…_

Marcus, sitting in the library, was reading an old book written by Valen's hand. When he wasn't teaching or training, he liked to stay in this place where he felt calm, forgotten by the rest of the world and where he could make silent his inner demons, what Turval called 'the noise in his head'. He'd never liked reverie or studies, but the calm of this place was pleasing to him.

He was becoming again the man he had always been—nimble, with his trademark: a constant, yet often peculiar humour, but a spring had broken forever in him and he knew it. Though, his retreat in the mountains had been good for him, he was feeling infinitely better.

Sighing, he closed the old book, put it back in its place with much care, and went out. Then he saw Ranger Tannier coming towards him. He knew he was in charge of the presidential guard and was assigned to the presidential residence. He saluted him.

"I'm surprised to see you here," he said, "what's happening?"

Tannier stopped. "I am happy to see you," he said, "I was headed for your quarters. President Sheridan and _Entil Z'Ha_ Delenn sent me out to give you that letter, they said you were the only man able to help them."

Marcus took the letter, and read:

"Marcus,

I chose this way of communication to be sure that this message will only be read by you. The Ranger who will give it to you is a trustworthy one. Someone kidnapped David, our son, and we need your talents to find him again. You are the only one able to find him. He was kidnapped last night, in his bed, but nobody saw anything.We just found a letter saying we will be contacted later.

We will be infinitely grateful if you would give us your help. Save David, we beg you!

In Valen's name,

Delenn"

She had never spoken, let alone written to him with this trustful, familiar tone, and he could sense beyond her words all the despair of a mother deprived of her only son. No, never, he'd never allow anything to happen to this child!

He ran to his bedroom, packed his things quickly and took the first transport he found going to Yedor. The old Marcus was back, the one who was one of the best at what he did, who knew how creep in the most dangerous zones without being seen, the one who had accomplished the impossible in former times to save Earth and who had escaped death so often.

During the run to Yedor, Marcus mentally re-enacted the plan, according to what he knew: the boy was in his bed, and, as he knew, his tutor and his governess were nearby, and yet nobody heard anything when the child was kidnapped. The morning, no more David, just a letter saying they would be contacted later.

He knew the president and his wife kept their son near them, in a very protected way, especially to avoid this sort of things. Moreover, they always had two Ranger units guarding them personally, so how did the kidnappers succeed without being seen?

His hood up, nobody paid any attention to him; the Minbari were used to seeing Rangers and no one looked at him. When he arrived in Yedor, he went to the presidential residence at his quickest pace. His coming was expected, so the guards let him go and a Minbari servant led him to the president's private apartments. John Sheridan stood up when he entered.

"Thank god," he said to him, "you came, Marcus."

The Ranger bowed. "I couldn't do less," he said respectfully.

Delenn, now just entering the room, bowed slightly to him. "If someone can find David again, it is you,"she said calmly.

"Did you make a list of your potential enemies?" he asked, "Or at least the most dangerous ones?"

"No," said Sheridan, shaking his head, "it would be too long. But I'm constantly asking myself so many questions that my head hurts! The first is: how did they do it? The residence is guarded night and day, as are our apartments, the only possibilities are that either a guard didn't do his duty, or there is a traitor in the residence."

The two solutions were plausible, and Marcus stayed silent a long moment before asking to examine the child's room. Nothing had been moved there, and he couldn't find any evidence that would suggest that the child, though he'd been surprised in his sleep, had put up any struggle. He examined all the furniture, and the Minbari bed but finally shook his head.

"It's very difficult to say anything now," he said, his voice wilted, "but things seem to be pointing towards inside support because there was no break in. Moreover, David didn't shout or fight, which would indicate means he probably knew his kidnapper."

Delenn looked at her husband. "But who? We've known our quislings for years, none of them would betray us," she said, some surprise and incomprehension in her voice.

Marcus saw in front of him this mother from whom her only son had been torn away, this worrying father, this family he owed so much, and swore to himself he would find their child, even if he had to do the Coriana VI battle again. He had to use his capacities of a hardened Ranger to track down and find who had kidnapped the boy.

He stood up and bowed. "I'll collect some information," he said, his voice hardening, "If the kidnapper contacts you, call me immediately and I will come."

* * *

On the _Titans_, Susan Ivanova had just learned, by way of the ISN channel, of her godson's kidnapping and was furious. Who dared to attack a child, especially this child she adored, that she viewed as her own? She quickly made her decision: she would return to Minbar and find him. Then, she would make his captors pass the most horrible period she could imagine for even daring to touch her godson. Instantly, the old Ivanova had returned, with her bad temper and her qualities that had made her one of the best war leaders.

In a couple of minutes, she called her commanding officer, general Wiggins, told him her reasons and her decision, and he gave her the go-ahead. Susan had enough accumulated leave time that she would afford to take a long absence. Also, he knew what kind of a relationship Susan had with President Sheridan and his wife because of their long common past, and knew he couldn't send anyone to Minbar who was more qualified to find little David.

That done, Susan called her second in command, lieutenant Carter. Some minutes later, the young man came and rang at her ready room's door. She gestured to him to sit in front of her.

"I am entrusting you with the ship," she told him, "I have to go for an undetermined time." Surprise flitted briefly across the man's face, followed by understanding. Susan continued, "I'm going to Minbar. If you need to call me, you can reach me at the presidential residence."

"Our thoughts will be with you, ma'am," he said respectfully, standing, "we saw the news and are all hoping the president's son will be found soon."

Touched by her second in command's words, Susan smiled. "Thank you, lieutenant," she replied, "I'll tell them."

He went out, and Susan quickly packed some things before going to docking bay two to take one of the shuttles parked there. She could go to Minbar quite quickly with it.

* * *

On Minbar, Delenn rushed into John's office.

"We have another problem, John," she said, "Susan is coming."

Sheridan raised his head from the file he was looking at.

"I thought we didn't tell her about David," he said, surprised.

Delenn sat in front of him. "We didn't, but you know ISN broadcasted the news in spite of us. What will you do if she meets Marcus? It would be devastating, for him as much as for her, and right now they won't be up to the shock," she said worriedly.

John stood up. "As you like to say, the universe will answer our questions, and we will see then. Though, I know that with both of them working at it, we will have a miracle team, able to find David, wherever he is." He came, sat near her and took her in his arms. "Don't worry," he said soothingly, "David will be found in good health."

She snuggled up to him, letting go of the tears she had been courageously holding back since David's kidnapping. "May the universe hear you, John," she prayed, her voice breaking.

There was all of a mother's distress in this phrase. Delenn usually controlled and hid her real feelings, but she couldn't bear it anymore, especially now, when her child was in danger. Her son, a miracle of genetics, that she had carried, despite her people's disapproval, without knowing if he could live and be normal, but, most importantly, he was a symbol, the symbol of her love for John, the symbol of the reunification of their two races.

They tried to keep him from all these political things, but it was probably because of one that he had been kidnapped.

Sheridan's secretary, Lonann, entered then and bowed. "Mister President," he said respectfully, "a personal message for you."

Sheridan rushed to the console, and a black screen appeared. Only a voice came, one that he couldn't identify.

"If you want to see your son alive, we ask fifty thousand credits and safe transport off Minbar." There was no identifiable accent; it could be anyone. Despaired, the parents looked at each other.

"Go and get the residence's chief of security!" ordered Sheridan, and Lonann rushed out.

Marcus, for his part, began his slow exploration of Yedor's down below. Since strangers were allowed to stay on Minbar, near the city some sort of aliens' sector had formed where humans and other races lived. It was the place where bad things were fomented, prevented by the Rangers, and it was the best place to find information. Marcus slipped near a human he knew and sat.

"Hey, Joey, haven't you something to say to your old friend?" he asked.

The man, as dirty as his bar, looked at him suspiciously.

"I know why you're here, Marcus," he answered, chewing on something, "and no, I have nothing to say."

The Ranger locked his dark eyes on his interlocutor. "I don't believe a word," he said coldly, "When there's a bad job to do, you're always involved."

Joey shook his head. "Hey, I dunno what you're talking about! I wasn't in Sheridan's kiddie kidnapping!"

A gleam passed over Marcus' dark eyes, and for a moment, Joey wasn't able to swallow.

"You know something, then," he said, his voice edged.

The man put his finger in his nose, and snorted. "Yeah, I heard something," he admitted. "A drunkie yesterday said someone paid him to see a particular transport to the spatioport. I didn't think nothing of it, but after an extra beer he told me he saw a child with two hooded silhouettes, probably Minbari ones."

A lead, at last! Even though Marcus' disciplined mind, shaped by Minbari masters, was telling him it was only a supposition, there was a good chance that the child was young David.

And as to why the Minbari would kidnap the president's son…? Marcus knew they could be extremists, especially towards Delenn, whom some did not consider a Minbari anymore. David, the living symbol of her 'treason', could be, for this kind of person, a precious prey.

He turned to Joey. "For your sake, you'd better let me know before you tell this to anyone else, and if I find out that you had something to do with this, I'll make you regret being born," Marcus threatened, a dark expression in his eyes.

The barkeeper swallowed nervously, but said nothing.

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	5. Chapter 5: Research

_Here it is, the new chapter ! Thousand thanks to __**Evil Shall Giggle, **__my precious beta reader, for her quick and so well done work_

_Chapter 5: Research _

Wrapped in his black cape, sitting in a dark corner, Marcus was waiting. For four days, he had been continuously trailing little David's kidnappers, and that had led him to the mountains, to an ancient, abandoned temple. With his training among the Rangers, he could follow without noise and without being seen and, clearly, the Minbari who were there didn't even notice him. He heard the child's cries, and clenched his fists: if they hurt David, they would pay for it a hundred times more.

However, for now, he remained hidden, counting the number of people in the temple, and, as far as he could see, he charted the room's configuration. He had located the traitor, the one who had committed the kidnapping—a Minbari in the president's residential guard whom he had met during his recovery. Though he didn't know his reasons or his name, he promised to himself to personally make him understand that Delenn, even transformed, was more Minbari than him. But, for now, he had to keep his head cool to free young David, and the rest would come after.

The important thing for now was to gather more information before beginning the child's rescue. Being a good Ranger, Marcus had well learnt his master's lessons. Strength and haste never do well, watching and waiting were better.

The weather became cold and rainy, and black clouds darkened the sky. Marcus huddled under his cape, waiting for the rain which wouldn't be long to fall. At least he would be less visible, even if he risked catching a bad flu.

Susan, once she arrived on Minbar, gathered all the information she needed and then began to hunt the kidnappers. Methodically, she explored all the possible trails, albeit less delicately than Marcus had. By chance, none of the men she questioned mentioned the Ranger's name. Susan wasn't surprised to learn that a Ranger was on David's track, and thought nothing more of it.

The old Susan Ivanova, with her strong temper, was back and no information would escape her, even if she sometimes was not very kind in her methods of obtaining it…

After many hours, Marcus was wet and cold, but his patience was rewarded when he saw three Minbari coming. They were visibly warrior caste members, with their dark costume and their big capes of thick brown fabric. When the secret door closed behind them, they began to talk in an old dialect but one that Marcus could understand.

"Did you send the ransom demand to the palace?" one said in a brisk, cold voice.

Marcus had the impression he had heard that voice before, even if he couldn't remember where. When he was training, many years before, he met many Minbari, but this voice was familiar, significant somehow, though he couldn't remember why. He thought hard, struggling to remember where he had heard this voice and finally succeeded. The Minbari's name was Aalann, he'd met him while studying with some members of the warrior caste, a co-operational training program organized by Turval some years ago. He had never liked the Minbari's despising eyes and disdainful attitude, and he wasn't surprised that he was involved in David's kidnapping.

He listened to the Minbaris' words, remembering all he could to charge them with. As a Ranger, his word was useful in front of a court, but he was no match for the word of high ranking military. But it wasn't in his habit to give up, and he followed them with the hope it could be useful.

Susan Ivanova was keeping tabs on all the information she had gathered, forcing her bright and ordered mind to operate in a way it hadn't for a long time. She wasn't an investigation specialist like Marcus, but she had succeeded in finding out which direction David had been taken.

Frowning, Susan methodically thought over the information. She could tell the kidnappers were Minbari, which wasn't surprising since she knew some of them didn't like Delenn and Sheridan.

Generally, when a child was kidnapped, it was to demand something from the parents, but here, no precise demand had been made, and the parents were simply waiting, hoping their son was still alive.

Even though she had found out much about the kidnappers, she still couldn't say why they had kidnapped the child. David was the President's son, and that was the most probable reason at the moment. Though, Susan knew that some Minbari disagreed with Delenn and John Sheridan's marriage and David's birth, so she had to consider that side as well.

A familiar voice came from the door.

"You should sleep, Susan," Delenn said.

Susan turned around and saw Delenn, wearing a large Minbari nightdress.

"What time is it?" she asked.

Delenn slowly approached her.

"It is after three in the morning," she said reproachfully. "That makes twenty four hours since you last slept, Susan…"

As she always did, Delenn wasn't showing it but Susan knew her well, and she could feel her grief, a mother's distress.

"I won't give up now, no way !" she said.

"David wouldn't like to see his godmother like this," Delenn answered calmly, "I'm sure he would say the same thing that I do."

Ah, Minbari logic and persuasion! Delenn, trained by Dukhat, was a pure product of that art. Though, in Ivanova's opinion, applying that logic to something so emotional was taking it a bit far, not to mention useless.

"Delenn is right, you should take her advice," John Sheridan entered the room, the melancholy Susan had seen so many times before on his face. He had worked all day, and his unshaven face was making him appear more sad. He had been normal all the day but he hadn't the courage anymore to put up a front for his wife and Susan. He wasn't the President of the Alliance at that moment, but a father worrying for his only child.

Ivanova put the word pad she had in her hands down on the table.

"Even if I wanted to sleep, I couldn't," she said, crossing her arms peremptorily. "You know that, John. You should get some sleep yourself, though."

Sheridan knew her too well for that. "Susan," he began, "I know you are worried about David, but we have to stay ready to go in case we get any information on his whereabouts, and you know as well as I do that a tired soldier is two times less efficient."

She sighed. "Alright, you have a point, John, as always," she said with a light smile.

She went out the room to go to her bedroom, and John looked at his wife. Delenn stood straight and dignified, as she always did, but he could clearly see that their son's kidnapping was making her suffer from within, he knew her enough for that. She hardly ever showed her feelings; she still had the severe discipline that Minbari were so renowned for. He went to her and took her hand.

"Come, let's go to bed, it won't help anything to stay awake. If hehas discovered something important, he'll call," he said reassuringly.

He had deliberately avoided using Marcus' name, but how much longer would they succeed to hide his resurrection from Ivanova?

Delenn brought her blue-green gaze to his, and in it he could see all her concern. He pulled her to him and held her, united in the same concern and pain.

Soaked and cold, Marcus struggling to keep himself from sneezing. To keep himself distracted from his nose and therefore to avoid being discovered, he thought of the things he had overheard. Aalann spoke about a certain 'great master' who could hardly bear the child's existence but who had decided to kidnap him for ransom. Who was this person? For now, David was still alive, in more or less good shape, judging the cries he had heard. However, it wasn't yet time to intervene, he had to do it in the opportune moment, but could the child wait for that moment? There was no room for doubt here, David had to hold out, at any cost, and Marcus knew he could do it. At least, he hoped.

As dawn advanced on Yedor, Susan Ivanova awoke, a strange idea in her head. While she had slept, her mind had been at work and for some reason she was almost sure her godchild was being held prisoner in the north mountain. Why hadn't this occurred to her before? All the evidence she had found seemed to lead there. The only problem was that she didn't know the region well, but that wasn't enough to stop her. She got up quickly, dressed and found a map in the computer. Where to hide a child, a human-like child? The far away region, where nobody ever went, was the perfect place. There were many caves and abandoned temples, and if she had to search in all of them to find her godchild again, she would!

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	6. Chapter 6: Releases

_After much time, here's the following of the story. Thousand thanks to my precious beta reader, __**Evil Shall Giggle**__, I gave her much work with this chapter and she took over her little spare time to do it. Thanks for that !_

_Chapter 6: Releases_

"John! She's gone!"

Delenn rushed into the bathroom where her husband was preparing for work. His face was pale from lack of sleep but Sheridan, looking at his wife, knew immediately who she was talking about. He put down the towel.

"Oh, I should have known she'd do this. I know her too well."

Delenn just nodded. "The guards didn't see her, I just asked them."

"This isn't a surprise," Sheridan sighed. "We both know what she's capable of."

The couple watched each other without saying anything more. Of course they trusted Susan, but they knew all too well what she was capable of, for better or worse. Sheridan took Delenn's hand.

"We must trust her," he said gently. "She will do all she can to find David."

Bowing, a Minbari servant entered. "President Sheridan, we just received this." He held out a data crystal. Sheridan rushed to a console, put the crystal into it, and an electronic voice spoke.

"If you want too see your son alive again, take all the laws allowing non-Minbari to share our citizenship off the Alliance constitution. If it isn't done in twenty hours, we will kill young David! At last, Minbar will regain its purity!"

Hearing that, Delenn wavered, but Sheridan, despite his own shock, still had the still had enough wits about him to hold her. The two parents looked each other but only Sheridan had the courage to voice the question haunting them.

"What are we going to do?"

**************

In the mountain, Marcus, soaked in spite of the thickness of his clothes, knew his wait was almost over. The man named "master" would soon arrive – he had managed to catch some words about that. It was the occasion he was waiting for to act and take David out of his kidnappers. From all the noise and seeing the comings and goings, he guessed there were at least thirty people in there. He held his _denn'bok_ firmly and prepared himself to act as soon as he could.

**************

Huddled in a corner of the cave, David was shivering. His kidnappers had little interest in him, as if he were only an object. He had wrapped himself in an old dirty blanket he'd found and was now dosing. They considered him a horrible thing but were still feeding him because he was a hostage. David, even if he knew about the feelings of some Minbari around him, didn't understand the reasons; he was too young and his mother had always protected him from hatred.

The ancient temple they were using as a hideout had been dug into the rock. The doors were hidden in the wall and one had to know the mechanism to enter. Above them, clever work had brought light in through the center of the rotunda forming the ceiling.

Aalann approached the child and looked him up and down. David, even afraid and exhausted, withstood his stare. After all, even though he was young, wasn't he a Sheridan? His parents, as he knew, had lived through worse things and he didn't want to prove himself unworthy of them.

Aalann stayed a moment, observing him. David didn't lower his gaze.

"Impure blood but warrior's heart…" the Minbari murmured. "Interesting…"

The call of another caste member turned him away from David, leaving the boy with the mysterious phrase.

"The master arrives! Leave the child!"

*************

Marcus' experienced ear, despite his tiredness, didn't miss the characteristic noise of a flyer stopping nearby. Four Minbari got out of it, and the Ranger recognized with surprise Vadenn, an esteemed and important member of the warrior caste. The man was known in all Minbar for his courage and his probity – how could he be mixed up in such an extremist affair? However, experience taught Marcus that appearance and reputation weren't always an honest indicator. He gripped his denn'bok in his hand and prepared to intervene. It wouldn't be easy but he had done worse and was ready to do it again.

**************

In the ancient corridors, Susan Ivanova was making progress. She had programmed her PRI with David's specific genome and that had allowed her to go further into the old temple, following the old routes which had once linked this and other sites. With some luck, the boy would be near the entrance and she could take him without be seen. Despite that, she had equipped herself adequately with the things she'd brought with her from her ship: one PPG and several various grenades. Just a bit of gear, to be light enough to flee quickly with David.

At last, her long walk was at its end. She saw a ray of light and heard some voices coming from behind the rock wall. They spoke Minbari, a dialect she recognized as being the warrior caste's even if she didn't understand it, her knowledge of the language limited to the common expressions employed on the _White Stars_. Trying to be as silent as she could, she accessed the room's plan on her instrument and realized David was by the opposite wall.

She hesitated a moment to gage the situation, then put the finishing touches on her strategy. She knew she couldn't fight all the Minbari in the room; she had to proceed differently. She rummaged in her pocket and took out a blinding grenade. With that, she could neutralize the people in the room while she took David.

Her shielding glasses on and prepared to run, she lightly opened the rock door and threw in her grenade. Using the panic, she ran to David, moving along the wall. Suddenly, she found herself thrown to the ground. A Minbari she hadn't noticed stood above her, and as she dizzily tried to get back to her feet, she caught a glimpse of the glint of bionic eyes. He hit her a second time, and she fell back, unconscious, on the rocky ground.

When the boy could see again, he realized with horror that his godmother was here, injured and bloody, tied near him by the wall. She hadn't regained consciousness.

****************

Twilight had come, and Marcus decided to use the shadows to act. He had carefully observed the door mechanism and, making sure there was no one around, snaked to the door. With a flick of his wrist, he spread out his denn'bok and, activating the opening, rushed in. The present Minbari were still a bit dazzled, but, seeing his Ranger clothes, sprang towards him. Marcus was in prime condition and sent some of them on the ground – until he remarked David in a corner and, near him, Susan.

His concentration lost, he didn't dodge his adversary and took a hit to the thorax and the abdomen. Marcus curled in on himself and didn't see another warrior at his back, who almost broke his left arm.

The Ranger was cornered against the wall with one useless arm, the other still holding his _denn'bok_.

"We live…" he muttered, "and die…for the One!"

He managed to stand and secured his _denn'bok_ in his right hand. David wasn't that far from him, and he quickly determined a retreat trajectory. Even injured and bruised, he knew he could run fast; it was his only chance. But how could he save Susan? He couldn't leave her here, but he couldn't carry her with his probably-fractured left arm. He knew he could handle the suffering, but would it be enough?

His mind was clear and, the shock past, he was thinking coolly. His condition wasn't that critical, he'd had worse in the past, but he wasn't alone this time. Two people were counting on him.

The Ranger jumped aside, caught David, tucked him under his arm and positioned himself in front of Susan.

"You're injured and outnumbered," Aalann sniggered. "You have no chance."

That, he knew perfectly, but he wouldn't—_couldn't_ give up. If he had ever thought otherwise, he wouldn't have been a Ranger. His blood was pounding in his temples while adrenalin was flooding his veins and preparing his body to flee, transcending pain. If he recalled correctly, Susan was light enough, he could put her on his shoulders. After that, he would need some serious help from Valen himself to get them out of this. And yet, he'd decided to attempt it.

Keeping his _denn'bok_ in his left hand, he put Susan haphazardly on his shoulders and jumped toward the door. He succeeded getting out of the cave but couldn't go further. He collapsed on the ground, propelling his burdens in front of him. David rose sharply and took Marcus' _denn'bok_. Resolutely, he held it out horizontally in front of him.

"You won't touch them," he said in the religious caste dialect.

Vadenn approached the child. "Insane recklessness of a weak being," he laughed.

But David's green eyes didn't flicker. He knew he was the heir of a long warrior lineage and didn't want anything to happen to his godmother and to Marcus, who had risked his life to save his. His education among the Minbari had taught him this: when one does things with determination, they almost always succeed, even if it is something considered crazy or with no logical foundation.

"David, get out of here," said a weak voice behind him.

It was Susan Ivanova, still bloody but conscious. She got back on her feet and, though wavering on her legs, managed to stand up. Despite her head injury, she wasn't seriously wounded; at least, she didn't think she was.

She wasn't about to let her godson stand up against them alone, but David didn't want to move.

"I can't, Susan," he said, with a seriousness he had inherited from his mother. "I am the only one who is not injured. And," he added, "I am a Sheridan. I won't give up!"

In front of them, the Minbari said nothing, staring at the little six-year-old who was facing them with such seriousness. If, to them, David was only the son of the human who had destroyed the _Black Star_ during the war and of the Minbari who had bypassed her people's laws to transform herself, they were now discovering that their opinion had been much too small and in this genetic chaos was hidden much strength.

A hand then took the _denn'bok_ from the boy's hands, and a voice that made Susan shiver to the very depths of her body spoke.

"You are a Sheridan, indeed," Marcus said fiercely, "but I am a Ranger, and I will fight."

So, suddenly, Susan knew that all the feelings the dreams, she had had were true. He was alive and he was standing there, in front of her. Marcus was bloody but alive, and was holding his _denn'bok_ before David and her. Each breath had to be making him suffer – some of his ribs were clearly broken – but he hid it well.

Aalann and Vadenn, with the others, spread out their own weapons.

"You're ridiculous, human," they said with wicked smiles. "What can you hope to do alone against us?"

Behind him, Susan Ivanova had collapsed and David ran to her. Obviously, the hit she'd taken was more than a minor concussion, and Marcus instantly forgot the state of his own health.

"I just want to bring back them safely," he said calmly. "That's all I want, and if I have to fight all of you I'll do it."

A gleam of determination shone in the Ranger's dark eyes, and he told himself that this couldn't be worse than his fight with Neroon, years ago. In any case, even if he had to give his life, he wouldn't let anyone approach Susan or David. In these conditions, his life made sense. He stood up straight, took the deepest breath he could, and approached his adversaries.

Aalann did the same.

"I will take your life, human!" he yelled, swinging near Marcus' head.

Marcus, exasperated by the term, dodged and struck out. "I am not—" he shouted, "—only a human! I am a ranger! _Entil Z'ha Veni!_"

No way was he going to let these people bring back from the past the question of Minbari blood purity and begin a war over it. He knew the task would be difficult, he was clearly outnumbered, but he'd seen too many impossible things to not believe now.

There were several blows after that that made Marcus' blood flow, but he didn't give up. Short of breath and exhausted, he continued as best he could until he stumbled to his knees.

"You're dead, human!" Aalann sniggered.

Marcus was near believing him when a noise caught his attention.

"Stop!" a loud voice commanded.

A Ranger squadron led by a tall Minbari encircled them, and part of them quickly disarmed the child's kidnappers while others took charge of the two injured.

"Take care of the child…" Marcus gasped, "and Susan."

Everything went dark…

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	7. Chapter 7: convalescences

_Sorry for the time elapsed, but I tried to have a contact with my english language beta reader and I hadn't one, so I decided to post this non corrected version. I hope it isn't too bad and I'm sorry. _

_Chapter 7 : Convalescences_

_Yedor's hospital_

Progressively, the black halo around Susan began to fade, as she was getting back in her body after having wandered during undetermined time in the limbos of unconsciousness. She wasn't suffering, she was just free from any tie, indifferent to the go and forths around her. Known or unknown voices, she couldn't tell.

Slowly, exterior world filtered to her, and all her senses began again to function. Time seemed to shrink, becoming tangible again and, at last, her brain succeeded in ordering to her eyes to open. Light injured them and a helpful hand lowered immediately the room's light level.

"She's awakening" a voice said.

In the room's semi darkness, her eyes, first blurred, became fixed on the indistinct form on her bedside. There was a minbari doctor with a minbari Ranger she recognized as being Tannier, attached to the President's personal guard. He made a sign to another Ranger, waiting near the door, and this one got out.

"Welcome again among us, captain Ivanova…" the doctor said.

And he started to examine her while Susan, in confusion, was trying to remember what happened

_Presidential Palace_

Delenn, sitting to her son's bedside, was watching him sleeping. Since three days the Rangers brought him back, dirty and exhausted, he didn't practically leave his bed, to the point she began to worry. The doctors who examined him had confirmed he was in good shape but he had a great shock enduring head-on the hatred of some persons of his mother's planet. But, by luck, in his eyes nothing had altered his childish innocence; he would recover by the uncommon force of his temper. Those who had wanted to use him as a pressure instrument on his parents had failed, and they would be punished as they deserved. Though, the real events sequence would be known when Susan and Marcus would awake.

David moved in his sleep, opened his eyes and lightly sat up.

"Morning, mum…" he said with a little hoarse voice.

He came on his mother's knees and huddled on her chest. She closed her arms on him and kept him there, as if the simple barrier of her arms could prevent anyone to touch her son. His eyes closed, David drew in this moment a feeling of security and fusion, as a reminiscence of the physical prenatal link which had joined him to his mother during nearly nine months. He needed this time of tenderness to succeed in overcome his ordeal, and Delenn perfectly understood that. David's little hands were clutching the fabric of his mother's dress, as if he was afraid to be kidnapped again, and she rocked him to relax him. He stayed a long moment there and raised his head.

"Do you know how Marcus and Susan are?" he asked.

She caressed his disordered hair.

"The last news I had, they were recovering well, but you know they were seriously hurt, they will stay many time in the hospital…" she explained.

A shadow passed in David's green eyes.

"You must not feel responsible, David, you don't have anything to do with that" she précised, understanding what he was thinking of.

But the child wasn't agreeing with her.

"They were hurt while saving me, so I am fairly responsible, mother…" he explained seriously.

She was recognizing her own way to return arguments, he was really her son, but he had not to carry this culpability which was not his.

"These persons kidnapped you for disservice to your father and me, David, that don't have anything to do with that and it is the same for Susan and Marcus' injuries. If you have to blame someone, it is your kidnappers…" she said watching him right in the eyes.

She didn't have the time to say more, her husband was entering the room and came kissing his son.

"Are you feeling better, son?" he asked gently.

David just nodded, and Sheridan looked at his wife.

"A Ranger just came from the hospital, Susan just regained consciousness…" he said.

A smile came on David's pale face under relief during a few seconds.

"And Marcus?" he asked.

Sheridan kneeled in front of his son.

"Don't worry, he is recovering well too but he needs more rest…" he explained.

The child jumped from his mother's knees.

"So I want go and see Susan!" he exclaimed, suddenly invigorated.

John immediately moderated his son.

"No David, I will go. She's still tired, you know, you will visit her when she'll be better and you too…" he said firmly.

The child frowned.

"Dad, I slept, I'm well now" he continued.

Delenn intervened.

"Your father is right, it is better he goes alone for now" she stated gently but firmly.

Sheridan posed a hand on his son's shoulder.

"You will stay here with your mother, and don't argue!" he ordered.

He looked him straight in the eyes.

"It was difficult for you too, you need rest…" he added.

"But, dad, I slept enough! " David protested.

But Sheridan broke him off.

"David Michael Dulann Sheridan, I expect you to obey to what I said, for once!"

The child didn't say anything more, knowing that when his father was using his complete name it was the end of the discussion. He didn't understand all his father's motives but could feel his concern.

Delenn used the occasion to change the subject.

"You will have a wash, dress yourself and we will go to the kitchens, I believe the chef has a surprise for you…"

This brought again a smile on David's face, he was starving, and he rushed to the bathroom.

"It will be difficult to stand him apart, but we have to, he suffered enough…" he said pensively.

Delenn nodded.

"Yes, but he will be stronger after that. He wanted to protect him, that wasn't the good thing to do because the shock was more violent for him…" she added.

The two parents looked at each other. Since David was born, the miracle child, they have overprotected him and they were realizing it wasn't the good way to do for him, keeping him away from the real world, the world which was behind the walls of the presidential palace. But they didn't say anything more because the child was going out the bathroom, clean and dressed. Delenn took him with her and Sheridan prepared himself to go to the hospital. His chauffeur brought him there and, fifteen minutes after, he was entering Susan's room. She was still awake and her visage was very pale, but her gaze loaded with a well known expression when she saw him.

"Where is he, John?" she asked with short breath.

"Don't worry for him, he is well, he is a strong boy, you know it…" Sheridan answered, believing she was questioning about David.

Susan frowned.

"I…don't speak…about David…but…about Marcus! Where is he?" she said with difficulty

Sheridan needed all his self control, but he was honest, time of hiding was over. Circumstances had decided for them, Susan had the right to know the truth.

"He was more injured than you, he is in the next room but the doctors are optimistic. You know he's stubborn, he will survive…" he said.

Susan let herself go by her pillow.

"I…I knew he…was alive…my instinct said it…to me…but…I didn't…want to…believe it…you…had to…say the truth…to me…", she said with difficulty.

"You have to recover now, Susan, and be sure Delenn and me are extremely grateful for what you did for us…" he said calmly.

Susan had a cough.

"I couldn't let…them…injure…my godson…but it's Marcus who…" she tried to explain with short breath.

Sheridan made her hush.

« You have to rest, Susan, you will say me all that later. Do you need something ?" he asked.

She shook her head and closed her eyes, overcome by exhaustion, and he came out of the room. He entered the next one. Marcus was lying peacefully on the bed, his torso covered by bandages, linked to a respirator. He was sedated and a device was maintaining him in artificial coma.

Sheridan approached the bed.

"You have to live, Marcus…for you and for her…" he just said.

Getting out, he asked to see the doctor who was in charge of Susan and Marcus.

"Captain Ivanova will be able to get out in one week and a half, but it will be longer for _anla'shok_ Cole it will be longer, he has many fractures and injuries…"

Sheridan nodded, thanked the doctor and was about to return to the presidential palace. There, he found David delighting in eating a special dessert made for him by the palace chef. Delenn, usually against all manifestation of gluttony, was letting him do for once.

When the child saw his father, he ran to him.

"So? How is she? And Marcus?" he asked.

The parents exchanged a gaze and reported their attention on their son.

"Susan still needs rest, but she's better. Marcus is getting better too…" he précised, chosing carefully his words.

David, relieved, finished his dessert under the eyes of his parents He was happy to have them together for once, that was pretty rare owing to their overcharged agendas. He didn't remark the gaze they exchanged, heavy of sense.

On the evening, Sheridan said to Delenn what Susan said and the fact she now knew the truth.

Ivanova's health came better slowly and, in her moments of consciousness, the reality of the situation appeared clearly to her. Marcus was alive, as he was when she had known him many years ago, and she couldn't really deal with that. What could she do now when it had taken to her so much time to accept his loss? Moreover, this was forcing her to remember theses moments she would have preferred to forget, Marcus' last words and herself regaining consciousness in the Medlab. There was she had said to Franklin afterwards, she was remembering all despite the passed years and this came to haunt her, again and again.

All these thoughts were torturing her more than her injuries' suffering. By luck, she was distracted a bit by the frequent visits of Sheridan, Delenn and David. Visibly, her little godson had come out of all that quite well and had recovered his cheerfulness, temperated by a new seriousness. David had understood many things, and he needed some time to assimilate them.

That afternoon, only Delenn came to visit her. She was worrying for Susan and had taken this occasion to talk to her alone, from a woman to another woman. She sat at the bedside.

"Good news, Susan, your doctor just told me you will get out of the hospital in two days. You will stay with us during your convalescence…" she announced.

Ivanova looked up at her with an unexpressive blue gaze.

"Thank you very much." She just said.

Delenn's concern increased when she saw this gaze. So she took the initiative of the discussion.

"I know we should have said to you that Marcus was alive, but none of you was ready for this revelation" she explained.

"I know you wanted to do right, and I don't blame you at all", she précised.

She paused, searching the good words.

"But I don't know what to do or what to think about that" she confessed.

This confession, which wasn't resembling Susan at all, worried Delenn much more. Susan was clearly in extreme confusion because it took her years to finish her mourning and now destiny was giving her Marcus well alive, to the less opportune moment. This was putting her in front of something which was never and had the opportunity to be now.

Delenn reassured her.

"Take all the time you need, we will help you if you wish it…" she just said.

Ivanova perceived all the sensitivity of this proposal and tried to smile to Delenn, but she couldn't. The _Entil Z'ha_ stood.

"I have to return to the presidential palace now; I will let you rest…"

Susan tried to give a hint of a smile.

"Thank you very much, Delenn, for all you did for me…"

Delenn lightly bowed and went out the room. She took the time to ask about Marcus' status, giving some instructions to the guarding Rangers, and she went home. She had many work waiting for her there, but she couldn't really concentrate on her ordinary files. Her husband remarked her distraction and, when they were dining alone after David's bedtime, he looked at her.

"What's happening? You really are worried…" he asked.

Delenn looked up at her husband.

"Yes, I saw Susan today and I have to say I'm really worrying for her. She is in confusion, what is understandable, but all these events are affecting her enormously. She is only the shadow of herself and I feel really guilty, we should have said her before, the shock would have been lessened…" she said calmly.

Sheridan took her hand.

"You're right, we maybe were wrong about that, but it is their way now to make, we will help us if they ask but we will stay aside, the rest only involves them…" he said.

Delenn plunged her eyes in her husband's.

"That is the same thing I said to Susan. After that, they have to estimate if their paths had to be common or on the contrary parted forever…" she said.

Sheridan nodded pensively. He understood easily what Delenn was expressing between the lines, the intuition of Susan's real feelings. Women's instinct would always surprise him, even if he was knowing Susan Ivanova since he had perceived something at the time, though he didn't relieve it because his mind was occupied by things much serious. Her reaction after Marcus' death had confirmed what he thought, but he didn't say anything about it to her. Now, this past had become present and had broken the fragile balance she had struggled to build these last years. He perfectly knew that Susan wasn't as mentally strong as she seemed, and that she was hiding bad healed wounds, but he also knew she always got back on her feet whatever it occurred.

"I trust her, I know she will make it and make the good decision" he said firmly.

Delenn had the intuition he was saying it essentially to convince himself, driven by his own concern…

MORE TO FOLLOW


	8. Chapter 8: Pieces of the puzzle

_I'm sorry of the time between the chapters, but my work took me much time these last months and translating from French isn't really easy. Sorry for the poor page layout, especially in dialogs, and the errors in the language. Since I have lost contact with my English writing beta reader, if someone is interested in helping me correct my texts, just send me a PM. _

_Chapter 8: Pieces of the puzzle _

A few days later, Ivanova, declared officially in convalescence, was transferred to the presidential palace under the care of two nurses. Installed in an armchair, she was looking to the park which was next to the residence without really seeing it. She hardly heard the door opening and David's small steps coming towards her. The child cautiously held a tray with a cup of tea.

"Mom asked me to bring you that…" he said.

Ivanova forced herself to smile to her godson and sipped the tea, although she wasn't thirsty. The only presence of David, with his innocent green eyes, was enough to dissipate part of the black thoughts she brooded over permanently. Since she had seen him for the first time, in his cradle, the little fellow had taken an important place in her heart and she knew that he would always keep it, no matter what it would happen. She felt the child's small hand posing on her arm. David wasn't saying anything, doing only this simple contact to try to comfort his godmother whom he felt, with his childish instinct, going deeper and deeper in the unhappiness. Susan understood his gesture and she smiled with conviction.

"Don't worry for me, David. I just need time to get better…" she explained

The child, sensing her frankness, smiled widely to her and both remained there, looking at the landscape changing under the light wind…

At the hospital, the instruments which were monitoring Marcus' breathing and heart rate began to wail, and the Ranger opened again his misty eyes on the world. He suffocated and a voice said him to cough before a burn in his throat made him breathe freely. Marcus' sense of vision cleared up progressively, and he finally managed to more or less clearly distinguish the minbari doctor leaning over him. He tried to speak but no word came out the barrier of his lips. The doctor made quickly sure that his vocal cords hadn't been damaged by intubation and told him to remain calm and silent. Slowly, the confusion reigning in the Marcus' spirit calmed down. Some parts of the last events, however, remained still vague; he was unable to remember some details with precision. He let himself go and went back in sleep whereas the doctor was completing his clinical examination…

At the presidential palace, one Ranger had just arrived with the news of Marcus' awakening, and he was immediately introduced in the presidential office. Sheridan heard what he had to say and then sent him back to Tuzanor before going into his wife's office.

"Marcus just awakened…" he said just after entering.

Delenn raised her head from the file she was examining.

"Did he say something?"

"No, the doctors say that intubation, without damaging his vocal cords, made them swell and it will prevent him to talk during a few days. For the rest, he will have to remain at the hospital one week or two, time necessary for his various fractures to mend…" Sheridan explained.

Delenn closed her file.

"Did you say this to Susan already?"

He shook his head:

"No, we will tell her this evening, she needs to rest before…"

In her room plunged in darkness, Susan Ivanova was lying on her bed, her eyes widely open, and tears came out without she could hold them. She had felt Marcus' awakening with her latent telepathic powers and various emotions had attacked her without her being able to bear them. She remained a long time in this position, crying silently, and then she managed to put herself together. Being Russian, she didn't really believe in destiny but since Marcus had escaped to death one second time was kind of a miracle and she saw some sign there. This time, it would be necessary for them to have the discussion that they couldn't have eight years ago, and she wouldn't shrink again.

A few days later, John Sheridan paid a visit to Marcus, still sitting in his hospital bed. His vocal cords finally enabled him to communicate and he told him in detail what had occurred.

"How are Susan and David?" he asked at the end of his story.

Sheridan carefully chose his words to answer him.

"David is well, Susan is still in convalescence but she's getting better and better…"

It wasn't completely true, especially morally speaking, but he didn't want Marcus to worry.

The phantom of a smile passed on the Ranger's face and he only nodded. Sheridan smiled to him.

"I already did it on several occasions when you were in a coma, but I still wanted thank you for what you did…"

Marcus raised his head.

"I did what I had to do. I couldn't let anyone hurt David…"

Sheridan shook his head pensively.

"To tell the truth, I expected something like that one day or another. That's for this reason we overprotected David since his birth, but it wasn't the solution. He was confronted violently with xenophobe hatred and he will have to grow up with that…"

Marcus plunged his gray glance into the president's.

"He'll do it, he's a solid child. As I told you he stood up against our attackers without blinking, he has temper and he knows what he is worth…"

Sheridan sensed the affection that Marcus had for David but also the subtle change which has occurred. Marcus seemed better, much more serene, as if he had found a new reason to live. However, all wasn't settled yet, and both men knew it.

"When will I be transferred to Tuzanor?" Marcus asked.

Indeed, it was the custom for the Rangers to complete their convalescence, when it was possible, to Tuzanor, inside the health centre of the training complex.

"The doctors didn't declare yet you were transportable. You were seriously wounded and you will remain here for the moment until they made sure that there is no other damage…" Sheridan answered.

Marcus simply nodded. He knew perfectly that once more his body had been severely wounded and ignored what eight years in cryogenics had done on the level of his physical resistance.

"But the Ranger masters asked for the permission to visit you, they will come the day after tomorrow…" Sheridan finished.

That brought back a franker smile on the Ranger's face. The president got up.

"I have to go back to my occupations, unfortunately, but don't hesitate to call us if you need something…" he said.

"Thank you for your solicitude, Mr. President…" Marcus respectfully nodded.

When Sheridan came again to the presidential palace, he found Susan sitting in the living room of the private apartments, a book in her hands.

"How is he, John?" she asked.

Sheridan smiled.

"He gets better and better, he could speak to me and the doctors are trustful…"

Susan shook only her head before saying:

"And me? When will I be authorized to go again to my occupations?"

Sheridan raised an eyebrow.

"Why? Aren't you well here, with us? In any event, the doctors didn't declare yet you passed fit for the service. You had a serious cranial trauma, inter other things…" he pointed.

"I know, John, but my ship needs me and…" Susan sighed.

He didn't let her finish.

"And it is out of question that Delenn and let you leave while you're not in position to take again your duties. If I must call the headquarters myself, I will do it…"

Susan answered nothing. She knew that they were worrying sincerely for her and that John was able to follow through his threats.

"Very well, I understood…" she said.

Sheridan had a smile.

"Think only to rest…" he said kindly before entering his office.

Susan nodded and, once the president had gone into his office, she posed the book she was reading. The inaction weighed her really now, even if she was conscious of what she owed to John and Delenn. But of now knowing Marcus being in the clear confirmed her in her resolution to speak to him before she would be passed if for the service. However, in spite of that, a part of her refused this discussion, wanting to avoid all that it represented, all these things remained unsaid, this relation stopped without having really started. A noise just behind the couch drew her from her thoughts. David had just returned from the monastery where he was studying the language and the culture of his mother's caste and he was using the time he had before his tutor's arrival to come and see how his godmother was. He came and kissed her.

"How was your day?" she asked him.

The child straightened his traditional minbari clothes and sat down near her.

"Did you know there were eleven different words to say "landscape" in minbari of the religious caste? " he asked.  
He added to his question an amused smile, which calmed down Susan. She had never succeeded in understanding all the subtleties of the minbari language of the religious caste, having only learned the basis to be comprehensible for the crews she formerly ordered aboard the _White Stars_. But David had learned very early all these subtleties of this language and the innumerable traditions of his mother's caste and his sharp intelligence found its account there. "You know very well that I can utter only some words, little one…" Susan answered him with tenderness.

But she didn't have time to say more because Vultan, David's minbari tutor, had just entered the room. He greeted her respectfully and took along the boy with him. Susan remained alone, in a meditative mood…

**MORE TO FOLLOW**


	9. Chapter 9: First moment of truth

_A big thank you to my Beta reader, AnneMary, who did an efficient and marvelous work with my awful English. _

_Chapter 9: First moment of truth _

A week later, after Delenn had returned from the hospital, she announced that Marcus would be moving to Tuzanor soon. Susan knew then that the time had come. The next day, her two hosts were absent, and she took the opportunity to leave the presidential palace without attracting attention, and walked quietly to the hospital. She quickly found her way with the floor plan, which was fortunately written in several languages, and she took the elevator. Her heart was beating loudly, her stomach was knotted and her hands were sweaty. She quickly found Marcus' room and carefully assumed a normal expression before taking a deep breath and knocking to the door. Marcus' voice replied, and she opened the door. He was sitting in his bed, a book brought by Turval in his hand, which he dropped when he realized the identity of his visitor.  
"Su...Susan ?" He just stammered.  
She had to gather all her courage to answer. "I ... I came to see how you're doing..."  
Marcus' grey eyes didn't leave Susan. Despite the years, she had changed little, even if one or two almost invisible white hairs peppered her auburn hair. However, she had always seemed beautiful to him, the Russian with a fiery temper who never gave up. His heart skipped a beat: despite the years, his feelings were still there, but what use were they ? She had probably moved on since then. On the one hand, he was afraid to know, but on the other, he knew that he had to go forward.  
He used minbari meditation techniques to calm down the frantic beat of his heart and replied with a reasonably normal voice.  
"It's nice of you to come and see me. Sit down, please. As you can see, I'm much better ..."  
Susan sat on the chair near the bed, her whole body tense, and a heavy silence settled on the room.  
"I found out that you're better too, I am happy to hear that..." he continued.  
And he smiled. The smile suddenly sudden brought a lot of memories to Susan and she was violently overwhelmed by emotion.  
"I found out that you command of your own ship now, it took long enough, you deserved it ..." he continued, as casual as if he was eating a meal with friends.  
He blessed his masters, to have put so much emphasis on self-control and meditation, and used those resources to not let her see how much he was moved by her visit. Her mere presence was causing a maelstrom inside him, beyond a simple physiological reaction caused by a loved one.  
Susan managed to pull herself together.  
"Yes, I was given the _Titans_, a _Warlock_-class ship using a technology based on Shadow one vessel." She answered.  
She continued:  
"I heard that you were now teaching the Ranger recruits, with your experience you have much to give them ..."  
So many platitudes! They were seeing each other for the first time in eight years by a miracle and all they could say were these meaningless things.

"I'm teaching with Turval and Durhan, and I'm learning a lot from them. Some procedures have changed, but the training is still almost the same." Marcus replied.  
A cloud passed in his eyes, and Susan saw it. However, this didn't last, and she saw another thing in his eyes, something he was unable to conceal. This troubled her even further because it proved to her that the feelings he had expressed before he fell into unconsciousness many years ago had survived cryogenics. It was something she had considered during her own meditations, but now that she was facing them, it stirred the depths of her soul.

"When will you leave?" He asked again  
Susan had a vague gesture and tried to smile.  
"When the doctor allows me to. It's thanks to you that I'm still alive, and I wanted to thank you..."  
"There was no way I'd let anyone harm you or David!" Marcus exclaimed.  
She recognized the old Marcus in this expression, the quicksilver, tireless fighter, but something seemed to have broken inside him. It could be due to the 'all the years which had passed but it hurt her to see him like that.  
Moved and tense at the same time, she stood up.  
"I'll let you rest. I have to get back to the presidential palace before they ask all the Rangers to look for me. Be well..."  
It was totally impersonal, but she didn't see what else to say. She was careful to keep a normal expression and pace as she left the room. She didn't know what to think or what to do, her mind was in turmoil, and she went to the local river to calm herself down. There were places for meditations which were used by both non-Minbari and Minbari, and she desperately needed a little quiet time to put her thoughts in order. She had to stop thinking wildly, and ask herself the right question: what exactly was she feeling for Marcus now? At the time of his death, she had discovered that her feelings were deeper than she had thought, they were probably more than mere professional friendship, and she regretted to have acted as she had, to have maintained such a distance while she was clearly attracted to him and she refused to admit it.  
She sat for a long time on a bench under an canopy of greenery, trying to bring order into her confused thoughts. She would have to talk to him some day, eventually...  
Slowly, she went back to the presidential palace. Delenn, who had just returned and was working in her office, heard someone walk into the adjoining room and recognized Susan's pace. She knew where she had gone, but chose to leave her alone, she knew that Ivanova probably needed it. This decided, Delenn ended her work before calling her aide to give it to him. Then she called the palace's kitchens, and asked them to serve tea in the living room. It was shortly before dinner time when she left her office and found Susan sitting in the room in the semi-darkness caused by a single wall-lap.  
"Are you ill, Susan?" Delenn asked, a bit worried.  
Ivanova shook her head and put the tea-cup she was holding on the table. She tried to smile but couldn't.  
"No, I'm fine, I'm not sick ..." she replied, in the most confident way she could.  
She raised her blue eyes to Delenn's face full of kindness.  
"I saw him," she said, "I saw Marcus and I don't know where things stand any more..."  
These words reflected exactly what she felt and Delenn could feel her confusion. It wasn't Ivanova's way to express her feelings so directly, but she was anyway due to several contradictory feelings of not knowing exactly what to do.  
Delenn poured tea into the cup, handed it to her.  
"Give yourself time to think it all through..." she said.

Delenn's calm and soothing voice helped calm some of the confusion that still reigned in Susan's mind. She moistened her lips in the hot liquid and said thoughtfully:  
"I have needed so long to accept the fact that he gave his life to save me that I really can't get used to the idea that he is now alive. I know I should be happy that he is ... "  
Delenn understood what was said between the lines. She too had once known the painful feeling of the loss of a loved one, grief and John's unexpected return, so she understood too well what stirred Susan's heart. The only difference was that Ivanova didn't really know what she felt for Marcus - even though, to Delenn's eyes, it was clear, - and she would have to admit it before she could finally have peace of mind.  
Susan quietly drank tea and stood up.  
"I think I'm going to rest, I'm tired and I'm not hungry at all ..."  
Sleep might help to sort it all out, at least she hoped so. Delenn smiled calmly.

"You're right, Susan, sleep well ..." she said simply.  
Ivanova went to her room, undressed and slipped into bed to try to sleep. As for Delenn, she gave dinner to David and awaited her husband's return. Sheridan, exhausted, fell on the couch.  
"Really, I will never like all these negotiations ..."  
Delenn approached him and he saw her worried look.  
"Something happened?" he asked  
Delenn looked at him with her calm blue-green eyes.  
"Yes, it's Susan. She used our absence to go to the hospital to see Marcus and she came back even more confused, I'm really worried about her ..."  
Sheridan put a hand on his wife's shoulder.  
"It's just her way of doing things, to confront herself directly with something hurtful, and it's normal that she doesn't know where things stands, but you know as well as me that she's tough, and if she needs help, she knows where we are ... "  
Delenn smiled, and put her hand in her husband's.

In the night, Ivanova, who had managed to fall asleep, awoke and saw that a cold snack had been placed on the table in her bedroom. She grabbed the alarm clock that was on her bedside table, it was almost 3 AM, and because she had gone to bed early, she had already had enough sleep. She sat up, put on a dressing gown over her nightgown, and went to the table to eat. Sleeping on it hadn't really worked, but she was feeling better anyway. She ate some fruit and went over to the window. The moon cast its pale light on the Minbari capital city and reflected on the crystal walls, but the landscape's serenity failed to soothe her troubled and confused heart. She took a deep breath and stood there, watching the landscape until the horizon finally lightened, and the palace came back to life after the night's rest...

**TO BE CONTINUED**


End file.
